Saturday, April 2, 2011

Stepping Outside my Comfort Zone

I'm that weird mix of person that is confident and shy at the same time. Does that make sense? I believe in who I am and what I do - and its true that there are times when I'm pretty loud about it - but when I'm meeting new people I hold back, I question whether or not to let my freak flag fly.

But being a new mom can be pretty isolating, especially now that I'm staying home with Desmond and don't even have work as a social outlet. Most of my friends with children live far far away or their babies are older and they are back to work. And, as weird as it is to be shy and confident, I'm also shy and extremely social. I like people. I like talking with people, being around people, meeting with people, learning about people - I need to be around people. 

The library: My favorite place to meet.
So, I'm stepping outside my comfort zone. I'm pushing through the shyness and I'm meeting new people. I'm biting my bottom lip and going to playgroups. I'm putting up a brave face and adding friends-of-friends through facebook just because they also have babies. I'm marching up to moms at LLL meetings and handing out my phone number, my e-mail address. And then I'm going ahead and making plans with them.

Its a fine line between friendly and creepy, I think, but I like to believe I'm doing okay. We're all in the same boat, thrust into this new world of endless day time hours and bedtimes that start before most people even leave for the bar on a Friday night. I'm doing something entirely different from my vagabond party life, I'm investing in someone's future. In may cost me my evenings out right now, but at least I'll have sunshiney days and, hopefully, some mama friends and babies to share them with.


  1. Farren, this is so good! I felt the same way when Scouty was a baby. It was lonely. I wasn't like all of my friends anymore, but I didn't really feel like I fit in with moms and I was just misplaced an uncomfortable. I joined a mama group called Hip Mama on (Maybe they have a chapter in your area?) It didn't like... change my life or anything, but meeting up with people I didn't know really helped me to get out of my uncomfortable shell. It was totally worth it to just get out there and be social! You're going to feel awesome and things will start to fall into place. :) I love you!

  2. ohhhhh this was TOTALLY me. when all your friends are stuck in party mode and don't have small beings to take care of, you absolutely have to step out and put yourself out there. and it is much easier to clear the air right away about certain issues that are important to the way you choose to raise your son than find out later on that the new mom you gave your number to is horrified that you are an anti-circ, breastfeeding, co-sleeping, babywearing type of mama. weed em out early, haha!

    and whoa...the library is so different! i'm so sad we don't have a cool library like that anymore to go to :(

    ughhhhhhhhhhh come visit us in the summer.

  3. this was me when I came to Canada a year ago and knew nobody! It was biggest fear... what will I do all day? I meet lovely amazing people through LLL and got to know lot's more like minded mama's. Having a young child is a great conversation starter and you can easily identify those who share the same parenting ideals.

  4. So Darn proud of you!!! I am completely the same when it comes to this as you and again.....soooooooooo proud of you!!! You are so amazing!!!! :) <3


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  6. Thanks for the support ladies! Riley, you know i want to come visit so badly, hopefully we can swing it! I would love to meet your new baby girl!

    Orla, meeting you at LLL made me so happy and you were so warm and welcoming that night. It was incredible for a new mom like me, so thank you!

    Amanda, I remember your strength as a new mom and it inspires me to keep it up. You are incredible!

    And Favrah, girl. You know I love you to pieces! <3